“A thousand years in your sight are like a day that has just gone by, or like a watch in the night.”
You know that girl who walks into the room dropping cups and pens, while bumping into chairs all while “whispering”, “Excuse me, pardon me, I’m sorry”; all while being 20 minutes late? Hi, how are you? That girl would be me. I can never seem to make it anywhere on time, despite how many hurdles I jump over to be closer to the location. Either I’m too early, where I find myself looking around the room wondering where everyone else is, or I’m too late. Now, this doesn’t just happen in my personal life, but it often happens in the life I “wish” I lived.
I found a Facebook status that I wrote when I was 22. The status said:
“I will have my Masters by 25. I will have completed my book by 28, and I will be a mother by 30.”
I have yet to even begin my Masters, my book is still being outlined, and I just turned 30…not only am I not married, I am still not a mother.
For the longest time, I thought me writing that status was my way in “speaking it into existence”. I couldn’t wait for the day that I achieved everything, and I could tell others about the status and brag about how faithful God. Well, 25, 28, and 30, have all come and gone; and here I am…no where near my goal. I often feel as if I’m running out of time, and not only running out of time, but not fulfilling the desires that I have.
It’s taken me years to truly understand and even find myself very thankful that I am not the author of time.
I can look at my life, as I’m sure you can as well, and see where I often times try to beat God to the destination. I have a horrible habit of telling God when I’m going to get there and how it’s going to happen, and in the process I end up so disappointed.
Let me be clear, God is fully aware of the desires of our heart. Psalm 37:4 says, “Take delight in the Lord, and He will give you the desires of your heart.” If you notice, that verse doesn’t end with a time frame. Why? It’s important regardless that we take delight in God no matter what! Stop beating yourself up because you haven’t gotten there yet, OR you’ve gotten there a little too early.
My dear, it’s ok.
Trust the process, but most importantly trust the Author of Time.