Have you ever been embarrassed of something really ridiculous like a gift that you have or for something at which you have worked hard? Have you ever tried to hide or severely downplay that gift? I have.
My home is fairly clean, at least for having a husband, 4 kids, 2 dogs and a bird. It’s not something that naturally occurs, I work really hard at it so when people started commenting and joking about it I became a little insecure. Maybe I was weird.
It seemed like all the real mom posts always talked about messy houses and piles of clothes everywhere. Trust me, I’m a hot mess in a whole slew of other areas but I have a system that works in this one… can I still be one of the real moms? My insecurity took over and I did some pretty ridiculous things. I started leaving out baskets of laundry when company came over. I would rush to put them away after they left but for that moment I was “real”. How can we be authentic people if we are hiding?
Then I had a moment where it really hit me. I was getting my house in order to host our weekly bible study and I had vacuumed the carpet. When I looked in the room from my kitchen I noticed the crisp lines in the carpet that usually make me feel accomplished and happy except now I was overwhelmed with doubt. I did not want to be made fun of again. I walked in my living room and with my shoes rubbed out those crisp lines to hide that it had been vacuumed.
Now cleaning isn’t necessarily a spiritual gift but serving is and having a clean home and laundry is a way that I serve my family. I love that they come home each day and there is no stress in that area. It’s what I am good at so why hide my gift? Seeds of doubt about your spiritual gifts are a way that the devil takes a foothold and pulls you down to nothingness. If you are so insecure about ways you serve then you stop and that’s exactly why the devil works so hard. All the spiritual gifts meet criticism, Preachers are constantly criticized for their messages or maybe the type of music played during service. What if they just quit because of those seeds? The devil wins that battle.
“Each of you should use whatever gift you have received to serve others, as faithful stewards of God’s grace in its various forms.” 1 Peter 4:10 NIV
We are given a command to use our gifts, no matter how small they are perceived, in order to connect others with the Kingdom of God. Being insecure about your abilities is just the same as doubting the masterpiece God has created. Find gifts in others and encourage them to use those for good and to not hide. Be proud yet humble at what personality traits you were gifted because you were created to be exactly what you are if not for a country but maybe for just one person.